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The helmet is mainly used for avoiding crushing your scull while you are doing brainless scull crushing activities you should have avoided in the first place. |
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The real reason why you never find a pair of socks after you take them out of the laundering machine, and the reason why your car keys never lays on the place were you put them. |
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Human body’s biggest flaw |
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The human body's biggest flaw is that you can be thirsty at the same time you have to pee. |
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IQ is a numeric way of trying to measure the abilities of logic thinking and problem solving. Often mistaken for intelligent! |
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Academic professionals who write things in chalk on blackboards - ostensibly to make you learn things - but who have an uncanny ability to stand right in front of the board, obscuring your view and making it absolutely impossible to copy anything down. This way of teaching is also extremely ineffective and old fashion, but is still used by incompetent academic professionals who think copying from them is more instructive then just copying directly from a book. This again is ironic, since from the book you can at least see the letters. |
When it comes to love there are six things you have to remember: - Dopamin
- Noradrenalin
- Oxytycin
| - Serotonin
- Kortisol
- Estorsteron
| The rest comes easy... |
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Madness is sometimes the quiet little voice in the end of the day saying,
“Hey, is there room in your head for one more?” |
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McDonald’s is the biggest producer of toys in the world, and still do they call themselves a fast-food chain when they don’t even produce food. |
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Life is like a beanstalk, isn’t it? |
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Modern art is what happens when painters stop looking at girls and persuade themselves that they have a better idea. |
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Newspapers are for those who likes yesterdays news. |
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Unintelligible answers to insoluble problems. |
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Eating pizza can be compared with having sex. When it is good, then it is really good, and when it’s bad, then it is still pretty good. |
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Planning is to bringing the future into the present so that you can do something about it now. |
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An awful lot of problems solve themselves if you just leave them be. |
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Quisling is synonymous with traitor, and origin from Vidkun Quisling, the only Norwegian who managed to get Norway to change the law and allowing death penalty just for his trial. |
The art of providing support to either or both parties of a failed relationship in an effort to highlight or resolve troublesome differences and to avoid distress for all involved.
If someone you know is having difficulty getting over someone, the best way to help them get over that someone is to tell them a joke. This will distract them and hopefully keep their mental focus off the relationship, if only briefly. Your mileage may vary depending on quality of joke. |
Religion is an outcome of people trying to find the answers to:- Where do I come from?
- What is the meaning of life?
- What happens after death?
| | or:
| How can I make a lot of money, and gain absolute power over mindless sheep?
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Saint Valentine’s Day is a pure commercial day, which allow a jerk to get away with being insensitive 364 days a year, as long as he buy flowers and chocolate, lingerie and a fancy candlelight dinner on the 14th of February. That is also why this day most likely were invented by a guy, and not buy a girl which most people think and believes is most logical. |
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Sleep is only a poor substitute for caffeine. |
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